Thoughts about Janis and Jesus

I've been listening to a lot of Janis Joplin this summer. There's something about the energy in her performances, her soulful and throaty vocals, and her unique appearance (complete with long, dangling necklaces, an assortment of bracelets, and pink, green, and purple feather boas in her wild hair) that have me entranced. She was a woman who could wail the heck out of a blues song and whose raw emotion captivated listeners. Of course, Janis was no stranger to suffering and the pain in her lyrics is evident upon listening to some of her songs. Considered an unattractive female, the ugly girl, she was ridiculed and once voted "Ugliest Man On Campus" during her attendance at the University of Texas at Austin. She was mocked for her appearance when she was younger, which is baffling to me because one look at Janis' wardrobe and I instantly wanted to get to know the girl behind the red-lensed glasses with the scarves and feathers. What was probably an accumulation of low self-esteem and a need for affection led Janis to have sex with whoever was willing to have her. Drinking heavily would be one of Janis' escapes but a battle with drugs would be her ultimate downfall. On October 4th, 1970, Janis Joplin was found dead from a heroin overdose in her room at the Landmark Hotel in Hollywood, California. She was only 27 years old.

One of my favorite Joplin songs is "Maybe" (a cover of the song by The Chantels), which is simultaneously beautiful and melancholic because she brought it to life with such intensity that the lyrics flowed from her microphone stand soaked in angst. Watching Janis pour her heart out makes me wonder about the human soul. Shedding light on the term "tortured artist", Janis had a beautiful talent but behind the melodies there was an empty woman who tried to find solace in all the wrong places. I have to wonder about my own soul, the extreme I could go to to feel wanted, to fill the emptiness within me that only God can fill. I think about the number of females out there who give up their bodies easily in exchange for affection. I think of the men and women alike who try to find an escape at the bottom of a bottle or wait for the next high. Reading about Janis' death sends a familiar pain through my chest and I wish things had gone differently. The pain is familiar because many other tortured souls have had similar endings.

I've had my own share of crushing depression, of days when suicide seemed like a nice break. My way out of that awful gloom was finding Jesus. The light of Jesus Christ can pierce even the thickest darkness. When someone told me there was a man who loved me and died for every single thing I'm ashamed of, every stain on my soul, just so He could be with me, well, it changed my life in every way possible. I wish Janis had found a way out of her own darkness, that someone had said "Hey Janis, Jesus loves you and He wants to get to know you". It seems so unconventional for Janis Joplin to be a Christian but anything's possible.

I leave you with a video of the song I mentioned above, "Maybe". Rest in peace, Janis.